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MY WEDDING DRESS inspired by MARK and MAGGIE
Hi ...
1 YEAR DEATH ANNIVERSARY OF OUR DEAR FRIEND HEP .....
EXCITED TO BE A MOM
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WEDDING
Waaaa!! We went kanina to Binan to buy our...
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Nagtext nga pala si Mark sa kin.. wala lang. Basta.. hindi ko na alam kung pano pa dapat magreact sa mga nangyayari sa buhay namen.. pero I think the best way for us is to stay as friends... kelangan ko pa mag move on.. kelangan rin niyang magpahinga sa mga pananakit na nagawa ko sa kanya... hay! eto kelangan kong pasayahin ang sarili ko para lang hindi ko maisip na nag iisa ako..
i didnt know that I was hurting you....
kala ko masaya na ang lahat dahil wala ng giyera sa mundo natin.....
ang sa kin lang, hindi naman sa umiiwas.. kailangan ko lang ng panahon para makapag isip isip.
hindi kita iniwan dahil sa hindi na talaga kita mahal..
at hindi ako ang mismong nangiwan, diba?
sumunod lang ako sa gusto mo.. pero iba ang inisip mo, inaway mo pa ko.. inisip mo na pinagpalit kita. eh ikaw? hindi mo ba naisip na PURO SARILI MO LANG INIISIP MO nang iwan mo ko? diba? pero ayus lang.. at least pareho na tayong malaya..
lahat nang tao natutuwa dahil pareho nila tayong nakikitang masaya.. pero kala lang nila yun. may mga panahon na naiisip din naman kita eh.. kaso pinipigilan ko yung feelings ko dahil ayoko muna dahil baka masaktan na naman kita. At ayoko na naman mangyari yun dahil baka mag away na naman tayo.. sana naiintindihan mo ko.. sana alam mo mga pinagsasabi ko.. salamat sa lahat ah.
alam mo naman na hindi pa rin naman kita kayang kalimutan eh.. weve been together for almost 2 years. mahirap kalimutan yun.. lalo na kung madaming nangyari. kaya ngayon, para pareho natin malimutan ang past, please understand na kelangan kong gawin to.. naiintindihan mo naman ako, diba?
alam mo naman na hindi maaalis yung nandito eh.. alam mo yun.. pero hindi lahat ng bagay eh kailangang naka stick sa isat isa... kung hindi talaga magkasundo kahit onting bagay lang, dapat lang na maghiwalay na diba? pero hindi ko sinasabi na forever magkakalimutan na.. hindi naman ako ganun eh. I still make it a point na parte pa rin ng buhay ko yung past ko. naging masaya man o malungkot..
it does not mean that when I say I HAVE MOVED ON, taken for granted ka na.. hindi yun.. ikaw pa... sa masasaya na nangyari sa labas ng Mama Maria Dorm ko.. yung habbulan every night hanggang madaling araw. Yung maghihintay tayo ng 12 am sa labas ng dorm pag monthsary natin.. yung pag alaga mo sa kin pag may sakit ako.. lalo na nung may bulutong ako.. tska yung pag tyaga mo sa kin at sa kalat ko nung nalasing ako at sobrang suka ko... you know what, naging maswerte ako dahil naging part ka nang buhay ko..
sino ba naman ang hindi sasaya sa pagkakaroon ng bf na tulad mo na kahit pagalitan na sa bahay ng mga magulang, nandyan pa rin sa tabi ko, nagpupuyat sa editing house para sa project ko.. Nagttyaga sa mga kagagahan ko.. hay..
teka.. tama na muna ang kadramahan.. nagaalburuto na si Jyx... hehehe... mya na lang..
~out~
Then si Pyar, he was disconnected. Thats so weird that after I texted him that he's still on line (status), it changed suddenly.. Naging Off line.. mmmmmm.....
(Stars- Callalilly) I am listening to this right now.
Today is Sunday na!!!! waaa!!!!! Sobrang bilis ng araw. Hay.. Ano kaya gagawin ko sa off ko?? mmmm... Gusto ko bumili ng stuff ko kaso I have to keep my money.. I just gave my mother P600.00 to buy sack of rice and I also have to give another 600bucks for my phone bill. Gawd! Im so stress sa work.. what more if I am thinking with all of these payments I have to pay! Shoot!!!!! (&&*%$%$ #&)
Nga pala, I almost forgot to tell you guys that I saw my ex bf. He's Joy. Of course he's a HE... He was my boyfriend when I was a bit immature.. hahaha!! that's right! I was only 3rd year high back then.. He was his girlfriend when I saw them going in the van at the terminal. Sakto pa naman that the van they will ride eh same van ko din! Kunwari I was not aware that they were there.. I was just texting Pyar and Maggie when I got in the van.. Tapos konting paeklat na "Oi, ano ginagawa mo dito?" Then he answered "Oi, san ka nagtatrabaho?".. Then I answered it.. Then pinakilala niya ko sa GF niya.. Her name is Rica. .. DONT CARE.. HAHA.. Kidz...
Then ayun, nanlalambot ako that I felt I was melting. Wala lang.. Though they werent doing anything from me pero the fact that you saw your ex with his new one! I do know that you will also feel what I felt, right? Though I dont love anymore... You can still feel that numb feeling running through your veins right? Especially when you see them both happy..
Pero not to mention how happy they were that they didnt care about us inside the van, like they were the only people inside! They were hugging and kssing and..... talking.. hahaha!!! Pero its irritating my ears!!! They talk so loud that I was having the like to kick her big mouth.. hahah.. I am so mean.. what the!
Then ayun, I was texting Maggie.. yah, were sisters talaga.. Kadiri daw sabi niya.. hahah!!!
Then I heard the girl that he was inviting Joy to spend the whole night in their house. Woah! Lakas ah! hahah..... Well, since its been 6 years since we broke up, of course he had meet a lotta gurls, right? He encountered diff. gurls..... And I can say that he had changed.. OH SO CHANGED!
When we were still together, well, I can see to him that he was so conservative.. Never ever said any bad words, too. But from what Ive heard kanina sa usapan nila and the way they treat each other.. Its like........... EEEUUUUUUUUUWWWWWWWWWWWW............ Hahaha!!!!!!!!!!
2 minutes more....
Anyway, change topic...
I miss myself... hahah!! the young LEN..... mmmmmm........ But I never changed naman eh.. ako pa rin si Sweet, baby, bunso LENNY...... heheheh.
1 minute left...
Miss you pyar!
Kuya Lance! Thanks for chatting.. kahit papano.. hehehe.. Miss you so much kuya! When I have a chance to go there, I will search for you!! haha.. makikitira ako! just kidding.. :D
mwah!
~out~
hay.. la lang. gusto ko magkuwento ng tungkol sa bday ko..
medyo okay lang yung mismong day ng araw ko. medyo badtrip kasi nag away kame ni christian.. pero naging okay na rin naman dahil kinausap kame and okay na nga... ayon.. tapos okay din kasi maganda ang CSAT ko.. naka 100 ako!!! :) after ng napaka tagal kong walang survey, naka 100 na rin ako sa wakas!! wahahaha!!!!
Wednesday, kahapon, ayun, sinundo ako ni Pyar sa IBM.. :) ang saya ko nga eh. :) hehehe.. tapos ayun. ang cute cute mo talaga!!! hehehe.. ang bango pa! i wore the one that he likes me to wear.. oh diba para maging crush na rin niya ko. hehehe.. tapos ayun nung nakadating na kame sa bahay eh tamang kwentuhan lang. hintay ng pagkain.. tapos kain na rin.. pareho kameng inaantok pa.. pero ayun, nakayanan pa rin namen. tamang kwentuhan.. asaran.. heheh.. tukso niya ko ng JOPAY dahil napakalaki ng hita ko. ah wawa.. :( ayun.. mag da diet na talaga ako...
haaaaaayyyy...... kiss niya ko!! heheheh.. pero sa cheek lang.. :) heheheh.. dami tao sa bahay eh, di pede.. :) heheheh....
he gave me a present!!!! CD ng taking back sunday! sweet... pati si Pedro binigyan din ako.. aaaah, you guys are so sweet!!! :) love you all!!! :)
sobrang antok ko at pagkauwi ni Pyar, tulog ako sa room... ayun.. mayamaya ang dami ng tao sa bahay.. etong bestfriend ko, ginulo ako bigla sa room!! kinikiliti ako sobra!!!! haaay.. ayun pagka kain nilang lahat, bili na kame sa 7 11 ng Matador (requested by my sis) .. ayun, 2 ang binili namen.. tapos si Oto, bumili ng kanya , 2 san mig.
grabe! nahilo ako sobra at nalasing!! haaaaaaayyy.... ayun... pagkauwi nilang lahat eh nakatulog na ko sa sala.. ang aga ko nga nagising eh! 6:30.. haaay!!! sakit sa ulo.. at wala na ko matandaan kung ano na ang nangyari kagabi pagkatapos ng inuman. o diba??... ganun pala talaga feeling nun noh.. ayun.. sakit pa rin ng ulo ko grabe.. nasusuka na nga ako eh..
sana dumating si pyar dito. sabi niya kasi uuwi na siya.. :( hay ang sad ko.. haaaaayyy!!!!!!!
nasusuka na talaga ako.. goodluck sa kin mya pag uwi ko. nag text na rin si ate ko eh, sabay kame uwi.. hay nako...
im still waiting for Pyar.. sana dumating pa rin siya.. :(
ang sweet naman netong nasa likod ko.. kainis!
haay.. gusto ko pa mag type dito.. wala lang tumatakbo sa utak ko.. nasakit pa sikmura ko. ang sakit din ng ulo ko. hang over.. good luck din sa kin sa trabaho ko bukas potek!!!!!
haaay.. buti nagustuhan nila nay at ninang yung dala ko na food. :) hehehe..
mukhang hindi na makakadating si pyar ah.. nahihilo na ko. nasusuka pa. hay nako!
kinig lang ako ng MAKEDAMNSURE sa youtube.. hay....
~out~
mwah!
haay.. kinakabahan ako sa chat ngayon.. kainis.. sana wala akong maging irrate member.. have to go! 8pm na! :)
kakakausap ko pa lang kay Pyar kanina.. wala lang. kulitan lang dahil sa weird na email address niya. ang kulit kasi eh, pinapabasa sa kin eh hindi ko naman talaga kayang basahin kasi nakakatuwa! hahahah... :) gagawa rin ako ng weird email address! hmp! :)
hay nako.. sana maging okay ang bday ko.. hay! miss ko na si Maggie, si Nil, si Michelle.. mga bestfriends ko.. Syempre miss ko rin si Jem at Gela... :)
hay......
o xa, gagawa pa ko ng template netong blog! :)
~out~
Come on! Just tell me.. youre just jealous!
you know what, I was about to "love" you again.. but then.... you were pushing me too to Joey! Then Joey pushing me to you! THE FUCK! Why are you people like that! Do you have any problems with me? If you dont love me, just tell it to my face then I'll stop bugging you guys!
My birthday is getting nearer... Gawd! Days gone so fast!
I am too old for this kind of stuff! I want to be more mature! You know MORE .. MORE MATURE!!!!!!
Well, all I can say is...... Yah, I am still in love with Pyar..yah! right!!!! I am ......But not hoping he'll love me back. Yeah, I know..... I'tll never happen.. It'll never be... (BITTER)
Shit! One minute left..
Love yah pyar!
mwah!
~out~